My flatmate doesn’t do their chores and I don’t want to seem like I’m grumpy and nagging them, what should I do?
My dearest nieces and nephews, I hope you are all doing well. After a brief hiatus filled with “finding myself” in Asia, running six marathons, and completing every other life goal ever, I am back doing my favourite thing in the world: answering all your student-related qualms for the one-hundredth-and-something year in a row.
As a first note, I would say that it is important to remember that in choosing to live with someone, you are opening your relationship up to the highs and lows of domestic bliss. This means allowing them to love you in spite of all of your hair-clogged shower drains, and love them throughout all of their rice-clogged kitchen sinks. In fact, there is no one I get more annoyed at than my lifelong housemate, also known as my mother. But I do not let domestic concerns, with her or my flatmates, bleed into our relationship — and neither should you. Any healthy living situation is bound to end in occasional squabbles and nagging, and any flatmate should understand and respect these boundaries.
In the instance of resolving the situation, try suggesting a weekly chore rota and setting a devised time for all of you to do your chores together — the Sunday reset has gained minor internet fame for a reason — it makes it feel more communal, and builds chore-completion into a shared routine. For smaller chores to be completed on a daily basis, I would suggest keeping a chart; I don’t think I’ve ever seen flatmates so competitive as when faced with a monthly bin tally.
Illustration by Amelia Patterson (@patt_paints) for The Student
