Having grown up in Australia before moving to England at 12 – amidst floods of tears as I left my school friends behind – and later to Scotland for university, I’ve learnt that friendships don’t stay confined to one place. Each move has meant starting over in a new environment while finding ways to stay connected, maintaining connections with friends who are scattered around the world – luckily this was made easier by the rise of social media that coincided with my move. Navigating long distance friendships has its challenges, but it has also made me appreciate how fulfilling these bonds can be.
One of the hardest parts of long distance friendships is the absence of shared everyday experiences. You miss out on the small, spontaneous moments that bond people, and managing different time zones and schedules can make staying in touch difficult. It’s also easy to worry that growing up apart means growing apart.
Yet, these very challenges are what makes long distance friendships so uniquely rewarding. Every call, message, or visit feels intentional and meaningful, a reflection of mutual effort. The distance pushes you to communicate in new ways – whether it’s sending a voice note, sharing pictures of your day, week or month, or even embracing the occasional early morning facetime call. A good approach to long distance friendships is to focus on quality over quantity. Just like in any meaningful relationship, being fully present when you do connect is key. Set aside distractions, even if it’s just for a short while, and really engage with each other.
Having friendships across different parts of the world adds a richness to life, letting you see the world through their experiences. Visiting my friends at all their different university towns has allowed me to see different cities I might not otherwise visit, and through the eyes of someone who knows them. It’s not surprising that shared connections can introduce you to like-minded people. I have met some of the most amazing people, my friends’ new friends, who reflect the great qualities I already admire in them. The people our friends surround themselves with can become just as meaningful in our lives.
Long distance friendships remind me that relationships aren’t about proximity but about effort. While distance can feel like a barrier, it’s also a chance to create deeper, more intentional bonds. And there’s something special about knowing you have a little piece of your life in different corners of the world. They teach you resilience, the importance of nurturing connections, and the power of shared experiences. If anything, the distance has only made me more grateful for these relationships. It’s a beautiful reminder that no matter how far apart we are, friendship knows no boundaries. And to that young 12-year-old who left her friends in a puddle of tears 10 years ago … she still sees them, still talks to them, even bumps into them on the streets of London. It’s been a great lesson in life that you can keep making new friends, but you don’t have to lose the old ones.
Photo by Clarisse Meyer on Unsplash