It’s three in the morning, still two hours before close, and sit down dinners are in full swing at Edinburgh’s favourite and seemingly only late night spot. Pizza Paradise, with its windows steaming as luxurious fumes of Italian cooking meet the cold exterior of South Bridge, is to a night out what a hot bath is to a rainy day.
Unlike every other establishment still open at this hour, Paradise’s bouncer doesn’t need to see your ID, but will take you to your table. I appreciated the effort put in by the staff to pretend we shouldn’t all be asleep; it feels almost like we’re acting out a really convoluted role play.
Like Hive beneath it, Paradise is not just somewhere to end a gruelling night out, but somewhere I might struggle to convince anyone else on going to in the first place. Sat at your table, you’ll be caught in the midst of an argument between the drunkest person you have ever seen and their ex they just saw out the window.
This isn’t the cheapest late night option in the city, but there have been times where it was the only one, and it’s not half bad. If anything, half the price of the pizza might as well go to anyone willing to work a shift on south bridge, serving customers suffering a Hive aftermath.
After deciphering the veggie options on the menu, a margarita and fungi pizza are delivered miraculously quick to the table; a jug of crisp ice water gracefully appears alongside them. This place clearly knows its audience because that glass of ice water hits better than any greasy food could right now – fair play.
Slated with a 2.5 on TripAdvisor, I see conflicting stories – some raving, some a call to action against a scam establishment. My favourite review from Daisy C, simply titled ‘Mice’ still gives it a solid 3 stars. Matt Noone is less forgiving about his kebab; “I looked for a homeless person to donate it to, but then I realised I could possibly be done for attempted poisoning” – 1 star.
Am I recommending you go? I’m not sure. If you want the experience of dining out of time with reality like an airport Wetherspoons with no windows, then you have an inner city destination awaiting you; I honestly have no complaints.
“Pizza” by nick.amoscato is licensed under CC BY 2.0.