The rise of dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge have changed how our generation views romantic relationships, with the phrase, “I’m going on a date with one of my Hinge matches” becoming an increasingly popular statement. But what does this say about us? Are we so impatient that we opt to swipe right on potential candidates in the privacy of our own flats, rather than bump into them naturally on the street? Or is the idea of meeting someone organically becoming obsolete in society today?
There is no denying that dating apps are popular and often successful, but are we relying too heavily on the romantic fulfilment these apps promise us to find “the one”, when many of us don’t even know what we are looking for?
Dating apps have objectively reshaped the dynamics of dating. The process is simple and straightforward: you swipe or like someone you already find appealing and receive a match if that action is reciprocated; erasing the initial question of whether you both find each other attractive. Despite skipping that initially awkward step, these actions promote social isolation, as you participate in the act of dating from behind a screen. By cutting corners, we are bypassing the formation of natural connections, and it’s worrying that people as young as eighteen are starting this process. We should instead realise that we are putting too much pressure on ourselves to sculpt something natural out of an artificial foundation; a foundation that is focused primarily on what we look like rather than the originality of our personalities.
However, the success rate of these dating apps appears to be higher than you’d think, with quite a few students being able to say: “I met my partner on Tinder”. I’m all for a Tinder Love Story, but why are these stories replacing organic meet-cutes?
The answer is, that people will rarely approach people they find attractive in public anymore. We owe this to the effects social media has on our self-esteem, causing us to worry if our feelings will be reciprocated. We aren’t helping ourselves by incessantly comparing fabricated and heavily filtered photos with others, swiping either left or right to our heart’s content.
This in turn, has made us as a generation greedier, now loving all our online options, focused on endless browsing and unrealistic standards. As a result of this, there is now a category of commitment-phobes who are just looking for casual flings and have no interest in building a meaningful connection. I believe it’s not that we are too young for dating apps, (they can be fun and successful) but rather that we are instead too reliant on their promised effectiveness. It might help us to notice that this digital shortcut is causing us to lose sight of forming natural, loving connections that don’t require you to swipe right!
“Dating Apps On Mobile Phone” by normadorothy2018 is licensed under CC BY 2.0.