I must admit, I’ve always wanted to do this. Although my non-existent level of fame means I have no place on the actual Desert Island Discs, my high level of presumptuousness means I’ll still tell anyone my eight tracks. Enjoy.
‘Money, Money, Money’ by ABBA
Ahh, ABBA, how could I resist you? ABBA is perhaps the largest musical cornerstone of my childhood. I vividly remember walking into my grandparents’ house each Christmas and being blasted with absurdly loud ABBA from a Hi-Fi system at least a decade older than my brother and me. To this day, hearing ABBA makes me feel like a child again.
‘Ain’t No Sunshine’ by Bill Withers
Whenever someone asks me my favourite song, I do not hesitate; it’s this. When I first heard the song as a teenager, I had never heard such depth — Withers’ suave, soulful voice is almost indescribably beautiful. I could never leave it on the mainland.
‘Comment te dire adieu’ by Françoise Hardy
Hardy’s coy, detached voice paradoxically compliments the profound sadness of the lyrics. When I first listened to it during my Francophile phase as a teenager, I found it so, well, French. Now, Hardy still makes me feel like I’m French — secretly, this thoroughly pleases me.
‘Upside Down’ by Diana Ross
I didn’t quite realise I’d picked so many songs about jilted love. Coincidental, I promise. To me, ‘Upside Down’ is the epitome of 80s music. It’s catchy, camp, powerful. You always need something to dance to, and for that I turn to Diana Ross.
‘Message in a Bottle’ by The Police
Again, this is coincidental. I have vague memories of my parents listening to The Police, and it seems to have stuck with me. It’s perhaps my most masculine trait. On the island, I think this song would appeal to my ironic side, or at least make me feel less lonely.
‘Paper Bag’ by Fiona Apple
In moments of despair, one must turn to Fiona Apple. Not only is ‘Paper Bag’ the soundtrack to much of my late teens; it is one of my all-time favourites. It validates loneliness in a way no other song can — it is a desert island necessity.
‘Spark’ by Tori Amos
Tori Amos and I go way back, but I always return to ‘Spark’. Its lyrics are in some ways rather bizarre, yet completely raw and heartbreaking. She wrote the song after a miscarriage, describing the struggle to start anew from the depths of despair. There is such strength in her voice, and if that wouldn’t motivate me on the island, I don’t know what would.
‘Good Life (Remastered)’ by Inner City & Kevin Saunderson
It is rare that a remix is better than the original, but ‘Good Life (Remastered)’ is exactly that. It’s hedonistic, uplifting, and simply irresistible. If I’m hosting a party, I can guarantee you’ll hear this. As a castaway, it would remind me of better times. Most importantly, it would make me happy.
Illustration by Lucy Wellington @luspaints